Sagittarius
I mean, come on, people, what are you thinking? The birthday party IS the gift for the guests, and the birthday girl or boy is the only one who should be opening presents. There is cake, games to play, a fun time to be had by all, and a goodie bag to take home is a lucky bonus. Did I miss a memo or something?
Are parents trying to one up each other with the birthday parties? Do our kids have so much control over their parents that they get whatever they ask for? Are we really this indulgent of our children? I'd say it's all of the above.
Whatever the reason, I would like to appeal to any parent who feels they must do this at their child's next birthday party to ask that you resist the temptation. Stand your ground. Do not give into this ridiculousness. STOP THE MADNESS!
We are the parents, remember? My daughter's birthday is next week, and we are doing a little crafty project during the party. That's what the kids get to take home. I bought no bags, no candy, no plastic toys, nothing. And even at this, I'm going to end up spending about $250 for this small bash after I buy cake, ice cream, food for the kids and adults, drinks for everyone (including the adults), the materials for the craft, the invitations, well, you get the point.
Our kids, for the most part, have more things than they can even put to use. Raising a generation of spoiled and indulged kids is not doing anyone any favors, most importantly the kids. My vote for the best party favor is the favor of teaching our kids to not expect the royal treatment wherever they go.
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Re: Parents, Wake Up! We're Raising Spoiled Kids!
By JenMoyn, August 4, 2008 at 18:27I completely agree with this author! I am a teacher and junior high counsellor who sees the "fall-out" from this parental indulgence everyday. Students want to be rewarded for doing school related tasks (homework, working quietly) that should be done anyway! The author talks specifically about giving the guests at a birthday party presents ( an offshoot of celebrity "swag" perhaps?), but it's just the same inflated sense of entitlement..wrapped in a different package!
She also urges parents to stop the craziness and resist the pressure to keep up with the Jones'. Parents aren't doing their children any favours by creating these one-up-manship based birthday parties. This is giving kids the clear message that presentation is everything and substance is secondary; "I'll put more effort into appearing kind and empathetic than actually BEING that way".
Never have I witnessed a more dramatic shift in children's attitudes than I have in the past 10 years. Parents who choreograph their children's lives in an attempt to create idyllic childhoods for them are, in actual fact, robbing them of the confidence to create success for themselves. To me the sign of a great parent isn't one who has a child who performs perfectly, it is one who has the strength to stand back and watch their child make mistakes. We learn MUCH more from failure than we do from success. And the success that we create on our own tastes so much sweeter!